Why cant I?

When was the last time I was proud of myself? Hmm, like real proud? I don’t even know. I remember last year I was proud of myself for writing a Japanese log everyday for 1 month. I was proud of myself for working for my dad with no complains all winter break. I was proud for doing the best of my best in my ECON class. Then came the loneliness of 2009. I ended up giving up when spring break started. But I really liked the me before that. Where did she go? Where is she now? What was it and who was it that made her so happy all the time?

I’ve been wondering about what happened to me this year. I’ve done nothing productive. I’ve done nothing that made me proud of myself. I just simply don’t like the way I am now. Let’s just say… I feel uncool :/ I’m pretty sure you (who read my blogs often) guys remember how sad and lonely I’ve become around the beginning of the year. Now I’m just pathetic.

I want to go back to the way I was, yet even better. The Hondai who was strong, hard working, confident yet at the same time, the Hondai who wasn’t lonely. Let’s see what I can do. I can do it! Yes! Yes!

Mood:Sleep but excited
Listening to: With love – Kana
Drinking: Water!
Reading: –
Working on: CP paper
Browsing: –
Watching: Cardcaptor Sakura