XXV

HondaiMood: hopeful
Listening to: I Was King – ONE OK ROCK
Playing: Osu!
Craving: water
Watching: YouTube Lives

We are, we are! We’re colors in the dark~

The crowd sang together as they push forward to get a better glimps of their favorite rock idol. Some rocking their souls out and others holding their recording devices so they can show off on social media. While I was there holding my stance in the crowd, at awe with the live performance.

I wasn’t prepared for this ONE OK ROCK concert but I knew they would blow my mind if I saw them live. I honestly haven’t listened to their newer songs for the past 2 years. I just couldn’t get myself into their XXXIV album. I assumed they were taking the same direction with Ambitions, their new album, but I was wrong. You can never expect ONE OK ROCK to do the same thing twice. They’re always changing and evolving, which is why they have made it this far. Their live performance was amazing as always. They got me at their performance of I Was King. There was just something about Taka’s melancholic screaming “I Was King” that pierced me right through. It was beautiful. I couldn’t ask for a better way to end the 24th year of my life. I made new friends from Japan and connected with my sister’s acquaintance to create a mutual friend. It was good to know that I wasn’t completely dead at socializing. I just haven’t been meeting the right people.

Lately things have been turning upside down for me in terms of my social life. I used to find more people I can connect with well through the internet but now, I’ve been finding more people that I connect with better IRL. You will probably hear me say this a lot but… I cannot get along with normal people. Don’t take my usage of Normal People too literally. By ‘normal people’ I mean the type of people who hold a certain type of characteristics. Here is how I would define ‘normal people’

nor·mal peo·ple
ˈnôrməl/ˈpēpəl
noun
A group of human beings that follows the latest trend to fit in with the mass majority creating a domino affect of mindless trends being recycled. Also often comes with the act of disregarding non-popular opinions. The only opinions that matter are what the media and everyone else does or says.

I don’t think it is unusual for people to do certain things to feel socially accepted. I get it, that’s fine. But my personal reason for steering away from these ‘normal people‘ is because these folks raise their eyebrows at things I used to do because I liked it or it was my hobby. Back then they didn’t care for it because it wasn’t the ‘trend’: it was simply not cool enough for them. But now that some of my hobbies are becoming a trend, they’re acting like they own it or it’s a part of their identity. The worse part of it all, they’re trying to get me ‘into’ it while I’m sitting here thinking “I’ve been doing this for years” or “I’ve told you about this before”. If I were to say things like that, it will sound negative.. like I’m a smart-ass. That’s just how I am I guess? To me these people lack a real sense of identity. Mindless puppets being manipulated by the media… Now that I think about it, aren’t these people called Tools?

In any case, all bitterness aside. I took my birthday off and had dinner with my family at Din Tai Fung. It was a good birthday. Now that I am 25, I wonder if anything will change? All I wish for is everything going uphill from here. I don’t being stuck in the ditch.

Current OSU PP: 910… we’ll talk about this later lol. Maybe I should aim higher like.. 2,000 PP by the end of the year? Yeah.